Cuba Gooding?! We didn’t even realize we were missing you.
by Ziwe Fumudoh
Fox has renewed “Empire” for a second season, and it’s no surprise why—the third installment in this series is devilishly wonderful. The episode begins with Tiana’s (Seryah) rendition of “Hot Boy;” for all intents and purposes, assume this was written by a sexually active preteen. Despite the mediocre lyrics, the song was catchy, and I have no doubt that I will hear it on my Pandora “Top 50 Hip Hop Songs We’ll Repeat Until You’ Start to Hate The Sound Of Music ” radio. Using Tiana and newbie Veronica, the bald-headed singer who harbors resentment for Tiana’s spotlight, writer Joshua Allen gave audiences a hint of the competition that comes with trying to be a female R&B star. This was quickly overshadowed by a tale of the male ego as Veronica’s manager gets his ass handed to him in a trailer after mouthing off to Luscious. Every time we place Luscious above the fray, he reminds us that he is from the hood, and that his knee jerk reaction to conflict will always be violence.
The moment that shows this the most is before Bunky’s funeral when Luscious confronts Cookie over suspicious pictures. He believes that she is working for the federal government and threatens to “destroy his enemies,” which now includes his estranged wife. This is the most dramatic irony I’ve bared witness to—the ex-lovers are literally standing over Bunky’s body as Luscious declares having no qualms with destroying friends. But Cookie, like many of the women in this show, always seems to have the upper hand on Luscious. Rather than admit to anything, she deceives him into believing that the federal agent she’s been meeting with is her parole officer. Luscious’s greatest pitfall is that he underestimates her intelligence. I’m sure this will become a reoccurring theme in the series.
The master manipulator herself, Cookie decides to visit Puma (aka Cuba Gooding needs work, respect the hustle), who happened to write a hit single for Luscious that he never truly appreciated. Cookie’s interaction with Puma reminds us that although she is middle aged, she still has men are lusting after her skin-tight leopard skirts. That is to say, that on a show that has largely focused on the seemingly powerful men and the hot young women that ride their coattails, it is refreshing that Cookie is being treated as the object of someone’s affection. Cookie of course takes Puma’s song, gives it to Jamal, and he performs during the family dinner meant to introduce Hakeem and Tiana’s budding relationship. To no one’s surprise, Luscious accepts Jamal’s performance while simultaneously rejecting his existence. This incident becomes a watershed moment for Jamal as he finally recognizes that his father is a homophobic dipshit that will never truly accept his “lifestyle” (Note: I say lifestyle in quotes because the only thing different about Jamal and everyone else is that he has sex with a man named Michael, and look at Michael, who could blame him?). With that realization, Jamal has the shadiest last word in gay history “How does it feel that your little girl could do something you couldn’t?” Yes, Jamal, if those aren’t fighting words, than I don’t know what is. Finally, Jamal rejects the money that Luscious has been using to control him and he’s off to destroy the notorious empire. Thus, “The Devil Quotes Scripture” reminds us of the Shakespearean tension brooding between the three sons who are all vying for their father’s attention. As detectives get closer to solving Bunky’s murder, it’s apparent that everyone is suspicious of Luscious secrets, and the truth has a way of revealing itself.
Lingering questions and stray Observations:
My heart dropped when I saw Naomi Campbell as a guest star.
“That hairy dingo berry,” Is this a racial epithet against Australians? Because it sounds very mean.
I would kill myself if it meant Gladys Knight would perform at my funeral.
“Please sit down, Portia.” Truer words have never been spoken.
I am waiting for the moment when “Move That Dope” plays during a flashback scene.
I’m a liberal from New England, it makes me very uncomfortable when Jamal refers to himself as a girl.
How in the world is Naomi Campbell a side chick? She is Naomi Campbell!
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Ziwe hails from Lawrence, Massachusetts. She started writing at Northwestern University where she studied film, African-American studies, and poetry. Currently, she’s acclimating to having adult responsibilities, like feeding herself. When she’s not watching TV, she spends her time staring out the window and thinking about chows.
